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We were looking for her very much, - the heartbreaking story of a family from Lviv, who adopted a girl from the Roma family

July 1, 2021, 18:35 95 Author: Maryana Romanyak 24tv.ua

The famous Ukrainian artist Olga Bartysh, who took education a little girl a few years ago, believes that adoption is not a heroism. Her family dreams that it will become the norm for Ukrainian society.

There are thousands of children in Ukraine who lose their childhood every day. Only a few get a chance for a normal family and relatives, where dad, together with the little knight, will tame imaginary dragons, and mom will sew a real dress for a fairy princess.

Every year the number of families who are ready to adopt children increases. It was at this moment that someone had a chance for a happy life.

Olga: at first there were no such girls

After Olga Bartysh gave birth to her eldest son, who is now 14 years old, and took him in her arms for the first time, she had thoughts about how many people in the world do not have a mother.

Olga Bartysh

Artist Olga Bartysh/Photo from the woman's personal archive

The woman says that the family had certain requirements for the child when they were looking for him.

So that she was healthy, so that she did not have brothers and sisters, because we were ready for only one child, and so that she was up to 4 - 5 years old, girl, - the artist shared.

When Olga called various services and was looking for a child, there were no such girls. Later she received a call from Transcarpathia and was told that there was such a child, but she was from a Gypsy clan.

"It was so as if it some kind of flaw, like a verdict of some kind, and I said that it was good, cool," the woman said.

The couple had no hesitation

Olga's husband Konstantin saw the girl's photo for the first time while at work. Immediately after that, he asked his wife when they will go after her.

Little Uma

Little Uma/Photo from the personal archive of Olga Bartysh

What was the attitude of the son to the desires of the parents

Before the adoption of the girl, the parents asked the eldest son Matvey if he would mind if a younger sister appeared in the family. His opinion was also very important.

I thought for a long time, and then decided that it would be cool and fun, plus my brother will have another good friend, so I was, of course, for, - said Matvey Kolomak.

Matvey even had a tear

The Bartysh family first came to Uma with their children. Then the youngest son Ivan was 1.5 years old. At first, it was not easy for the couple, because the girl did not understand what they were talking about.

“She was so little standing next to me and we were to her, and she was like an ordinary child. We asked her something, and she was“ ay-ay, ”and that was the communication,” Olga said.

The Bartysh family

The Bartysh family with children/Photo from the personal archive of Olga Bartysh

According to Konstantin, when they first go to meet, Ivan, Uma and Matvey began to run together, and he just watched them. Then the girl was 2 years old, but she was much smaller than Ivan.

When we were already returning to Lviv, Matvey even had tears when he was holding some kind of cork from a bottle. He said that she drank from this bottle. I look, and his tears are really flowing, - the man recalled.

Subsequently, Matvey was very sad because they went home, and the girl stayed.

Olga: it was very not so easy

At first it was not easy for Olga, because at the time of adoption, the youngest son was still an infant and the woman had her own regime. At the same time, 9-year-old Matvey studied at home, was preparing for tests and he needed help.

"We had a habitual, but relaxed life. I baked pies, wore skirts and it was so blissful and beautiful. And then suddenly a child appears who is very temperamental and active," Olga said.

Маленькая Ума очень активна

Маленькая Ума очень активна/Фото из личного архива Ольги Бартыш

What difficulties did you have to face

The most difficult thing for the family was that Uma often cried. Neither Olga nor Konstantin had gone through psychological training before. They did not take advantage of any courses that were offered to them.

By that time, the family lived outside the city and it was inconvenient to get there. The couple had a small child and husband worked.

In the end, I think, yes, what kind courses, can't i love baby . I have such a big mother's heart, I love this world. I learned Zen, and they tell me about some courses, - Olga remembered.

During the first 3 months, when there was the most acute stage of adaptation, everything was on the verge. The couple understood that it was impossible to continue living in conditions when the husband went to work in the morning and came back in the evening.

Olga had to look after the baby, the eldest son and Uma, who did not yet understand the language, did not know how to go to the toilet and cried constantly.

The family was at first hard

The family was at first hard/Photo from the personal archive of Olga Bartysh

“I didn't understand how to survive with it at all. And, probably, half a year later I wrote a message on Facebook, and then psychologists began to help me with advice,” the woman recalled.

Children have become real friends

According to the father, Uma and Ivan either reconcile, fight, or play. They have so much energy that more than enough. The girl's character is complex, but you can work with him.

Ivan is sometimes sad, and sometimes cheerful, when he is fooling around with me. Sometimes he attacks me. Our favorite games are Lego and fooling around, shooting games and jumping on a trampoline, ”Uma said.

Uma and Ivan

Uma and Ivan became friends/Photo from the personal archive of Olga Bartysh

How a family sees its future

The family recently arrived from Egypt, where they lived. However, it was not easy there, because it was necessary to work, earn money and take care of children.

The older is studying and he needs to be given attention, there is no kindergarten. But at the same time, it's very cool, because children get the right skill - they are so adaptive," Olga said.

Later, the family plans to move to live in Poland, and spend the next winter in India, if the borders are opened. If not, other options are Bali or Thailand.

Father with little Uma

Father with little Uma/Photo from the personal archive of Olga Bartysh

Olga: We do not hide the fact that we adopted her

Uma's mother said that their family does not hide the fact that they adopted a girl. The child knows that there used to be some kind of house.

“We were looking for her very much and asked where is our daughter, where is our Umasya. It's such a fairy tale and she really likes it,” Olga said.

The woman even has a version for Uma that she gave birth to Ivan from the tummy, and her from a heart. The youngest son constantly says that his mother gave birth both from the heart and from the tummy, and the girl only from the heart. After that, they already walk together and then play their role-playing games.

Perhaps earlier it was such that "not native". However, now they are all relatives and equal to me. That one can be slapped on the ass, that the other, if deserved, - said Konstantin.

Happy to be together

Happy to be together/Photo from the personal archive of Olga Bartysh

The family does not regard the adoption of Uma as a mission. They did not do something cool or global out of this and would very much like it to become the norm for many Ukrainians.

"These are people from the outside what kind see and say what good fellows you are, heroes. You sit and think, where is the heroism? This is normal," Olga said.

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